The dreaded D-word is one that couples hate to talk about. More often than not, the reality is that many marriages end in divorce. It’s not the case for every couple, however, it’s an undeniable truth that must be recognised.
Although it is important that you try to save your marriage, it’s also important to recognize when it’s no longer working and accept that you must let go. Divorce can be tough on everyone involved, not just the married couple. Children, family, and friends can all feel hardship during these tough times.
In an ideal world, divorce would be a simple procedure – the unhappy couple simply signs some papers and waves their goodbyes. However, it’s not often the case. In this blog, we’ll explore how you can deal with divorce and how to encourage a painless process.
Find a Reputable Lawyer
Even if you have a very amicable relationship and you’ve decided to divorce, it’s always a good idea to hire a lawyer to help you go through the entire process. Divorce involves a lot of paperwork and proceedings, so having legal assistance can be useful. If there are children involved and the relationship between the parents isn’t the most cooperative, we recommend hiring the best child custody lawyer in West Virginia.
Don’t Ask People to Pick Sides
Whether it’s friends, family, or children, you should never ask others to pick sides when you are going through a divorce. Although it may be difficult to maintain individual relationships with your respective friends or family, it’s important to remain neutral with all parties involved. If you have any children, asking them to pick sides can result in deep psychological trauma.
Research the Divorce Process
Even if you are going to seek legal assistance, it’s wise to familiarise yourself with the process and understand what this separation will entail. Whether the divorce is a joint or singular decision, one spouse must file a legal petition to the court and ask to terminate the marriage. Then, the process can take anywhere from 6 to 18 months or longer to resolve.
Communicate with Your Kids
No matter how young your children are, they have a right to know what is going on in their household. Don’t involve them in your arguments or drama but do keep them in the loop about their family status. Many children from divorced families recall feeling torn and isolated during the process, therefore, it’s important for their mental health that you take their feelings into consideration.
Build a Support Network
After death, divorce can be one of the most traumatic experiences in an individual’s life. Therefore, you should never be ashamed to seek out help and build a support network around you. Now is the time to catch up with that old friend for lunch or reconnect with your long lost co-worker over a walk in the park.
Speak to a Therapist
Although having a network of friends and families to rely on can be amazing, you may need a more professional perspective in assessing the situation. Speaking to a therapist can help you unpack your relationship issues and figure out what went wrong. They offer a less biased view of the situation, as they are not as closely involved with your friends or family members.
Grieve Your Relationship
Even if you are the one who initiated the divorce, you should never forget to grieve your relationship. You must come to terms with the fact that you are no longer together and sharing a life. Part of this process involves grievance and allowing yourself the space to mourn. Whether you need a tub of ice cream, a holiday abroad, or anything in between, cut yourself some slack during these tough times.
Avoid Seeking Revenge
The last thing you want to create is a toxic environment, so avoid seeking revenge on one another. This will only create a destructive cycle in which nobody ends up winning. Be the bigger person and keep your head held up high during your divorce. If you do find that your partner engages in this kind of behaviour, try to avoid any sort of interaction, and seek legal advice.
Everybody talks about how great marriage is, but nobody speaks about the devastation that occurs when it doesn’t work out. At the end of the day, everything happens for a reason. Sometimes things simply aren’t meant to work out and once you accept this fact, you will be able to find inner peace.